Life around here has felt a bit like a circus act, the last ten days or so—the one where jugglers or acrobats spin plates on top of poles. If the performers don’t look sharp and step lively, the plates will topple off and break.
Hardly anything happening around here has been of any consequence, although one of our plate-equivalents did break in fairly spectacular fashion. We were told the man was unhurt, but one of the roofers did manage to fall through a second-floor ceiling shortly after the crew started the job. During the multiday power outage. But I digress.
Feeling some stress, I’ve been asking people how they try to cheer themselves up when the occasion calls for it. The first one I asked was my sweetheart. So, what does he do?
“Oh, I’ve kind of given up on that,” he says. After a moment, he adds “I go see my honey.” And what do you do together, I ask. “We just talk,” he explains, and smiles sweetly.
“You don’t just look at yourself in the mirror and see your gorgeous hair and smile?”
“I look in the mirror and see my gorgeous hair and it drives me crazy. I need a haircut.”
A friend feeling a lot of stress in the aftermath of a stroke was more succinct. “Being outdoors” is what cheers her up.
Daughter Number Three says she does something that’s fun for her, which tends to be “getting out and being with people. And the Merlin app.* I’m a crazy birder. Praying. I like to pray. A social thing like a walk can be good for the whole day. I like to be out in the city, out for a meal or something to drink. I like the social dynamic.”
D#3’s husband says he goes for a walk. Where? “Anywhere,” he answers. “If I had the option, I’d walk a trail.” Then his face lights up, and he announces, “I like to pick up gum balls.** I have a Gum Ball Picker-Upper—best birthday present I ever got. I pick up the gum balls in our yard. I pick up our neighbor’s gum balls, too.” His last haul was twenty to twenty-five gallons of gum balls.
“And spend time with my wife,” he adds. “You have to remember that I interact with people starting at 6:30 in the morning till late at night. There are lots of distractions.”
Brooks, D#3’s grandson, is three. Grandma and Grandpa say all it takes to cheer him up is something more interesting to do than what he’s already doing. “A new toy,” they say in unison.
“It depends on why I’m not cheerful,” says Daughter Number Four, when asked what she does to relieve stress. “Sometimes music helps. Or curling up with a blanket and a good book with music playing in the background. If it’s a school thing,” says this teacher, “whining and complaining to friends.”
Daughter Number One says friends cheer her up. Doing what with friends? “Talking to them. I like to get outside, get some exercise. Could be a walk. In the fresh air.” What about geocaching? “Geocaching helps because it’s outside, but my good geocaching buddy moved away,” she responds cheerfully. She just retired after a long happy teaching career and may not need cheering up for quite some time.
“We just replaced our deck. It’s bigger and maintenance free. The kids and grandkids are coming over tonight to try it out, and we’re having cake and ice cream.” You can hear the smile in her voice.
She asks her husband what he does when he’s stressed. He answers, “I don’t feel stress.” This is probably accurate self-assessment. The man has a gift for stillness, peace at the core of him. He says that occasionally he tells himself, at the beginning of the day, “Today, I’m going to do everything right.” Then, most likely, he does.
“Mountains and horseback riding,” D#1 summarizes. “That’s what he’d do in retirement.”
“And I’m doing it now,” he says. He spends his days in the saddle and in the mountains. He is one contented man.
D#3 and her husband tell us they’ve been on the beach in South Carolina when a butterfly flutters past. Then one or two more come by a few seconds later. And then another one, going the same direction. And the humans realize this is it–butterfly migration—and they’re there to see it. Think about that when next you’re feeling stressed.
10 July 2026
*Merlin Bird ID, an app from Cornell University, identifies birds by their songs.
**Hard, spiny fruit that falls in profusion from sweetgum trees.