Guarding the Citadel

Guarding the citadel against all comers is a responsibility our animal companions take very much to heart.  My friend, Marcia, can attest to this.  She had a Rottweiler as head of security some years ago, when she found a kitten in the street during a downpour.  The kitten ended up with Marcia and family, and learned how to conduct herself in that family from the dog.  Marcia says the dog took it upon himself to sit on the step by the door and growl when people came to the house, just to let folks know he was large and in charge.  One day, someone approached the house while the Rottie was away, so the kitten dashed to the step by the door and growled.   

     Our dog feels he has a lock on what needs to be done when people come to our house.  He was, however, flummoxed when Tesla accompanied our friend Sue on a recent visit.  Tesla is a border collie with a gift for making friends, but Rascal was rocked to his core.  Clearly the new dog could have anything she wanted in Rascal’s domain:  she’s two-and-a-half times his size.  She sized him up as nervous and didn’t approach, checking out the new space instead.  Rascal, though horrified, just let her, even when she sniffed his food. 

     He drew the line, however, when I reached out to pet Tesla.  This was not to be tolerated.  Rascal leapt onto a chair and hurtled himself under my arm and onto my lap as I sat on an ottoman.  There, looking out from between my arms, he made a stand:  this human is taken.  This one is mine.  Rascal may be small, but he thinks he’s mighty.

     When my husband and I leave the house together, my husband says, “Watch the house, Rascal.”  The dog would contend that he always watches the house.  He takes the job seriously, and it’s been particularly challenging of late.  Our Thanksgiving guests, for instance, just walked in.  Clearly, that should have required a barking, but Rascal likes the guests.  What should he do?  By the time the dog had decided on a response, it was too late to make one.

     Don is the person who’s really giving him fits.  He’s here working on our remodeling project, and Rascal has known and liked him for years.  Rascal feels that even Don needs to be reminded of who’s in charge, but he keeps coming and going.  Should the conscientious head of security give him a good barking every time he enters the citadel?  Settle for alerting us?  No, Rascal places himself prominently by the door each time, ready to emulate Marcia’s Rottie.

     The trouble is, Don doesn’t always enter through the front door.  If he’s carrying drywall or something else heavy and cumbersome, he uses one of the back doors.  Now, while Rascal knows about all the back doors, he only sees them, as far as we can tell, as ways for someone already in the house to exit and return.  Not as a way to breach the citadel.  So, when Rascal was all set up by the front door to let Don know he still had a dog to contend with, and Don came in one of the back ways, the information did not compute.

     “Look,” I said to Rascal, “Don’s here.”  Rascal eyeballed Don in the family room, then reassumed his position by the front door to wait for the intruder.  Don couldn’t be the intruder.  He was in the family room.  He must already have been in the house.  Rascal stayed on the job by the front door for several minutes before padding off, satisfied.  He’d clearly dealt with whoever had been coming, without even having to bark.

     Don, unfortunately, has been requiring follow-up lessons in how to behave.  The last couple days, he’s been using an impact driver.  This is like a drill, which is bad enough, but even more offensive.  An impact driver is flat-out unacceptable.  Don should know this.  And if he didn’t know it before, he should know it now.  Rascal tells him, by charging and barking.  I put the dog on a leash to calm him down.  When he’s wearing his leash, he thinks he’s protecting me from very close by. 

     Don assured me there was no need.  He’s not worried about Rascal.  Don’s dog Xavier weighs two hundred and twenty pounds.  He has a whole different approach to troublesome visitors.  He doesn’t have to bark.  Or even growl.  All Xavier has to do is show up.      

3 December 2021